A Determined Journey by Rolf D. Schmidt
Chapter 1 - The War Child
Berlin - The Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial Church ca. 1940
Conceived in a moment of senseless passion as an escape from the gathering clouds of a major war, the unwanted child was born into a world embroiled in total warfare; in a totalitarian society bent on conquering the world. The outlook for his future was grim; his chances of survival virtually zero. So begins a journey of danger, fear, unrelenting challenges, despair and passion, ultimately to end in total fulfillment.
He was baptized in the major Lutheran church in the center of Berlin, Germany, the ruins of which later would become a memorial to the senselessness of war.
His earliest sustained memories go back to a night in 1943 when he was standing on the main avenue not far from the church when the sirens went off indicating an imminent air raid. His mother started to hustle him toward the public zoo bunker a couple of blocks away. They did not make it in time and the doors were locked when the bombs started to fall. The War Child thought that the tracer flak fire and the burning planes coming down were pretty and looked exciting. Huddled by the entrance to the bunker they were let in during a lull after the first wave.
Over the next two days and nights, some of the heaviest attacks of the war would destroy most of the central areas of the city, with the government and diplomatic quarters at the Tiergarten leveled. The nearby Zoo was hit hard and some of the wild animals would roam the streets for days.
When they emerged from the bunker after two days, the church was on fire. All birth records were lost and the War Child officially ceased to exist.
Not much later his actress mother was called to active duty to entertain the troops on the eastern front. She refused to let her son being placed in a Nazi holding camp, instead gave him to his grandfather, where he would remain during the next two years until after the war ended.
Opa had one purpose left in his life and that was to keep Rolf-Dieter alive, for that was what the War Child had been named. He and everyone else called him Dieter, who would in later years learn to despise that name with a passion.
Dieter stayed in the apartment with Oma and Opa most of the time as the air raids still were rather infrequent. If one came they would go down the five flights to the bunker and stay there until the all clear was sounded. He adjusted to the routine but started to be afraid as he saw surrounding buildings burn and collapse.
Opa decided to take Dieter out of Berlin to his summer house to get away from the bombings. The crippled transportation system was still working to some degree but it took them two days to cover the 70 kilometers. There was relative peace in that area. They would watch the waves of allied planes on their way to Berlin. After a while it seemed that the Russians could overrun the area soon. Their armies stood at the Oder river about 100 kilometers away.
So Opa decided to return to Berlin. They had to walk amid long lines of fleeing refugees under constant dive bomber attacks zeroing in on the columns which were laced with retreating soldiers. They walked through burning towns and fields littered with dead people and animals. There was little food and no water. When Opa saw a plane coming in for a strafing run he would throw Dieter into a roadside ditch and jump on top of him to protect him. Sometimes they landed on bodies and Dieter was screaming that Opa's weight was hurting him. After a few days they were covered with mud and blood, their clothing shredded.
When they finally reached Berlin the city was burning and full of smoke. They managed to get to the Kaiserdamm apartment building and went straight into the bunker.
Dieter was whimpering and he was frightened. Pictures of what he had seen kept racing through his mind. He was too young to comprehend what was happening and he did not know he was lucky to be alive. Death was a meaningless concept to him.
Soon the building started to shake from the ground bombardment. The Russians had encircled the city with the largest army ever assembled and the biggest military battle ever fought was about to begin. It would destroy whatever was left of this once great city.
Dieter had apparently gone into shock, but there was nothing that could be done for him.
When silence finally came, the occupiers herded everyone out of the bunker and made them stand on the avenue to watch their victory parade. The women were taken aside to be raped by the drunken Mongolian soldiers.
Opa was holding Dieter tight, who had his eyes closed as if to protect them from the sudden light after the months of darkness in the bunker. In reality he was starting to understand what was happening and could not face the terror.
Dieter remembers that day in every detail. Berlin had fallen and Germany surrendered 5 days later.
The War Child was alive, one of the few. For the rest of his life he would fear dark enclosed spaces.
Koenigs Wusterhausen and Friedersorf
The war child was almost five years old, although he had no concept of that. There would be no celebration; there had not been any since his first birthday. For as long as he could remember during his short life, there had been fires and searing heat that he felt whenever he was outside, which was not very often. There also was the never ending noise from the air raids and the wailing of the sirens when an attack was imminent. Long and high pitched, repetitious for the beginning; and short ones for the all clear. There had not been many all clears lately.
About that time Opa decided to take Dieter to his summer house in Friedersdorf to escape the mayhem. They took the S-Bahn to Koenigs Wusterhausen, continuing on a steam train.
When they arrived at the residence they saw that the road had been blocked by a large tank barrier, one of many that now were being built all around Berlin in anticipation of the upcoming battle with the Soviet Army.
The house was on the outskirts of town; on a large farm with many fruit trees, and gardens planted with vegetables, berries and flowers. There were a number of rabbit cages, ducks, geese and chicken; all designed to supplement a rather limited food supply.
In the middle of the property was a small bunker buried under a lot of sand with vegetation to camouflage it. There was a room which could hold about six people sitting on a bench. A few steps led to a trap door from where one could look at the sky and watch the allied bombers flying over on their way to Berlin. Or as sometimes happened, they would attack local targets, such as the railroad junction in Koenigs Wusterhausen.
After a few days Opa realized that it had been a mistake to come here, as the Russians were rapidly approaching. Their only alternative was to return to Berlin, despite the bombings and the dysfunctional transportation system.
The journey became the source of the main nightmare that has haunted Rolf all his life.
Under constant air attack, artillery shelling; and being targeted by dive bombers, they reached Koenigs Wusterhausen after a heavy bombing. About 20 km from Friedersdorf, it had taken them almost 24 hours to cover the distance. Most of the town was in flames. Rolf remembers the burning sensation from the heat when passing through the narrow alleys. Women were standing all along the streets passing buckets of water from a stream in an effort to put out the fires. It was useless. The incendiary bombs being used started blazes that could not be put out with water. Dieter was terrified. Somehow they managed to get through to the open fields. It was two more days before they reached the inferno that Berlin had become.
Now the sound of the sirens and the falling bombs was replaced by the rapid staccato sound of machine guns, the rumbling of tanks and their cannon fire.
In later years Rolf would block out those memories during his returns to Friedersdorf after the war.
The property was confiscated by the East German Government in 1949.
He was baptized in the major Lutheran church in the center of Berlin, Germany, the ruins of which later would become a memorial to the senselessness of war.
His earliest sustained memories go back to a night in 1943 when he was standing on the main avenue not far from the church when the sirens went off indicating an imminent air raid. His mother started to hustle him toward the public zoo bunker a couple of blocks away. They did not make it in time and the doors were locked when the bombs started to fall. The War Child thought that the tracer flak fire and the burning planes coming down were pretty and looked exciting. Huddled by the entrance to the bunker they were let in during a lull after the first wave.
Over the next two days and nights, some of the heaviest attacks of the war would destroy most of the central areas of the city, with the government and diplomatic quarters at the Tiergarten leveled. The nearby Zoo was hit hard and some of the wild animals would roam the streets for days.
When they emerged from the bunker after two days, the church was on fire. All birth records were lost and the War Child officially ceased to exist.
Not much later his actress mother was called to active duty to entertain the troops on the eastern front. She refused to let her son being placed in a Nazi holding camp, instead gave him to his grandfather, where he would remain during the next two years until after the war ended.
Opa had one purpose left in his life and that was to keep Rolf-Dieter alive, for that was what the War Child had been named. He and everyone else called him Dieter, who would in later years learn to despise that name with a passion.
Dieter stayed in the apartment with Oma and Opa most of the time as the air raids still were rather infrequent. If one came they would go down the five flights to the bunker and stay there until the all clear was sounded. He adjusted to the routine but started to be afraid as he saw surrounding buildings burn and collapse.
Opa decided to take Dieter out of Berlin to his summer house to get away from the bombings. The crippled transportation system was still working to some degree but it took them two days to cover the 70 kilometers. There was relative peace in that area. They would watch the waves of allied planes on their way to Berlin. After a while it seemed that the Russians could overrun the area soon. Their armies stood at the Oder river about 100 kilometers away.
So Opa decided to return to Berlin. They had to walk amid long lines of fleeing refugees under constant dive bomber attacks zeroing in on the columns which were laced with retreating soldiers. They walked through burning towns and fields littered with dead people and animals. There was little food and no water. When Opa saw a plane coming in for a strafing run he would throw Dieter into a roadside ditch and jump on top of him to protect him. Sometimes they landed on bodies and Dieter was screaming that Opa's weight was hurting him. After a few days they were covered with mud and blood, their clothing shredded.
When they finally reached Berlin the city was burning and full of smoke. They managed to get to the Kaiserdamm apartment building and went straight into the bunker.
Dieter was whimpering and he was frightened. Pictures of what he had seen kept racing through his mind. He was too young to comprehend what was happening and he did not know he was lucky to be alive. Death was a meaningless concept to him.
Soon the building started to shake from the ground bombardment. The Russians had encircled the city with the largest army ever assembled and the biggest military battle ever fought was about to begin. It would destroy whatever was left of this once great city.
Dieter had apparently gone into shock, but there was nothing that could be done for him.
When silence finally came, the occupiers herded everyone out of the bunker and made them stand on the avenue to watch their victory parade. The women were taken aside to be raped by the drunken Mongolian soldiers.
Opa was holding Dieter tight, who had his eyes closed as if to protect them from the sudden light after the months of darkness in the bunker. In reality he was starting to understand what was happening and could not face the terror.
Dieter remembers that day in every detail. Berlin had fallen and Germany surrendered 5 days later.
The War Child was alive, one of the few. For the rest of his life he would fear dark enclosed spaces.
Koenigs Wusterhausen and Friedersorf
The war child was almost five years old, although he had no concept of that. There would be no celebration; there had not been any since his first birthday. For as long as he could remember during his short life, there had been fires and searing heat that he felt whenever he was outside, which was not very often. There also was the never ending noise from the air raids and the wailing of the sirens when an attack was imminent. Long and high pitched, repetitious for the beginning; and short ones for the all clear. There had not been many all clears lately.
About that time Opa decided to take Dieter to his summer house in Friedersdorf to escape the mayhem. They took the S-Bahn to Koenigs Wusterhausen, continuing on a steam train.
When they arrived at the residence they saw that the road had been blocked by a large tank barrier, one of many that now were being built all around Berlin in anticipation of the upcoming battle with the Soviet Army.
The house was on the outskirts of town; on a large farm with many fruit trees, and gardens planted with vegetables, berries and flowers. There were a number of rabbit cages, ducks, geese and chicken; all designed to supplement a rather limited food supply.
In the middle of the property was a small bunker buried under a lot of sand with vegetation to camouflage it. There was a room which could hold about six people sitting on a bench. A few steps led to a trap door from where one could look at the sky and watch the allied bombers flying over on their way to Berlin. Or as sometimes happened, they would attack local targets, such as the railroad junction in Koenigs Wusterhausen.
After a few days Opa realized that it had been a mistake to come here, as the Russians were rapidly approaching. Their only alternative was to return to Berlin, despite the bombings and the dysfunctional transportation system.
The journey became the source of the main nightmare that has haunted Rolf all his life.
Under constant air attack, artillery shelling; and being targeted by dive bombers, they reached Koenigs Wusterhausen after a heavy bombing. About 20 km from Friedersdorf, it had taken them almost 24 hours to cover the distance. Most of the town was in flames. Rolf remembers the burning sensation from the heat when passing through the narrow alleys. Women were standing all along the streets passing buckets of water from a stream in an effort to put out the fires. It was useless. The incendiary bombs being used started blazes that could not be put out with water. Dieter was terrified. Somehow they managed to get through to the open fields. It was two more days before they reached the inferno that Berlin had become.
Now the sound of the sirens and the falling bombs was replaced by the rapid staccato sound of machine guns, the rumbling of tanks and their cannon fire.
In later years Rolf would block out those memories during his returns to Friedersdorf after the war.
The property was confiscated by the East German Government in 1949.
The Bunker at 102 Kaiserdamm
Cold, dark and crowded it was located under the apartment complex where Oma and Opa lived. It was designed to hold about 80 people. There were double bunks, which consisted of 2 hammocks hung on a frame. Dieter was on the top in a corner. There were no lights and very little ventilation. Sanitation was provided by night potties, which were taken outside by volunteers every day to be emptied. Everyone wore the same clothing around the clock. As a result of these conditions there was a horrible stench in the bunker.
Water was available only when it rained, although there were some back-up supplies hoarded in anticipation of a shortage. There was no food, sometimes volunteers ventured outside looking for slain horses to gather the blood and meat. The population in the bunker consisted mainly of older women and old men. Dieter was the only child. All able people were forced into the streets to fight, including young boys down to the age of 6. Dieter was 5 by that time.
He spent most of his time sitting in his hammock. The only light he saw was when the hatch was opened to let some air in. The building was never hit, if it would have been, the rubble from the collapse would have buried everyone alive. It was one of the few in the area not hit.
After the surrender, Dieter would sometimes walk around looking at the devastation and some women frantically searching through the debris for loved ones. The subway entrances were flooded with corpses floating around for the first few days. In one of his last acts of madness Hitler had ordered the subways flooded, drowning thousands of women and children having sought refuge in the tunnels.
The Russians did make an effort to prevent outbreaks of disease and starvation.
There now was a deadly silence.
Berlin had for all practical purposes ceased to exist.
An aerial view of the Tiergarten and the Berlin Diplomatic section, looking down the Kaiserdamm shows the immense destruction from the bombings and the final battle for Berlin.
The terror edged on their faces, German POW's taken by the Russians in Berlin. Some of the few survivors; now facing the long march into captivity and ultimate arrival at forced labor camps in Siberia. It was not until 1952 that the last prisoners were sent home. Many had not made it to that date. The ones that did, faced an uncertain future, had to rely on government help for their needs and most of them did not have a home or family to turn to.
Dieter's Christening - April 1940
At the Kaiser Wilhelm Gedaechnis Kirche with Franz, Hilde and his mother. The background is looking down the Ku-Damm which by the end of the war was totally destroyed. Franz became Dieter's Godfather, a role which he admirably took on. He would become the family member Dieter was closest to.
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In the reception area of the church
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Mother with Dieter after Christening
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Dieter 1940 - Kaiserdamm Apt
The ultimate in luxury!
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Dieter 1942 - Isolde Strasse
Most of the buildings in this area were destroyed by 1945. Number 9 was never touched.
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Dieter ca. July 1942 - Before all Hell broke loose
Pictural history survived for few families in Berlin, or for that matter most German cities, as most personal belongings were lost during the war. It was also the last thing people had on their mind in their fight for daily survival. As Dieter's family residences and homes were never touched by the bombings and street fighting, most of his history has survived. Some of it had never been seen by Rolf when he received the papers after his mothers's death in 1997.
Tyrol, Austria - Mid 1943
Oma had taken Dieter to this beautiful place in anticipation of increasing air raids on Berlin. They stayed with some friends. He has some very fleeting memories of running through the fields with the little girl and looking at the mountain flowers blooming all over the place. It was not until his teens that Dieter came across the picture and asked about it. He was told that the day after the picture was taken an errant bomb killed the little girl. Oma had taken him back to Berlin the next day.
Berlin - April 1945 - Street Battles
The city center under attack. The Russians had to fight house to house, every bunker, every street to reach the center, taking horrendous casualties.
They wanted to capture Hitler alive, but were three days late. They hoisted their flag over the Reichstag and went on a rampage of plunder and rape until the Russian command restored some order.
They wanted to capture Hitler alive, but were three days late. They hoisted their flag over the Reichstag and went on a rampage of plunder and rape until the Russian command restored some order.
Artillery spaced every 20 meters surrounds all of Berlin, each firing every 45 seconds into the center before the final assault
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Bodies litter a Street by the Zoo
Thousands of bodies were left in the streets for days at a time, as it was almost impossible to move about.
Below, the faces of fear is engraved on the the children about to go battle. A whole generation was sacrificed in a futile attempt to defend the city. |
Russians storming toward Center
Battle hardened Russian troops storm through the streets under fire from the rag tag German defenders, paying dearly for every inch gained.
When it was all over they would take brutal revenge. |
The last Defenders - April 1945
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Endless Russian Tank Columns advancing through the Outskirts
In the ruins lining the streets children and old man were waiting with make-shift Molotov cocktails which would prove to be deadly to the tanks and the last defenders.
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Apocalyps in Berlin 1945 is a Video shot during the final Days of the Battle of Berlin. It contains some highly graphic pictures of the conditions in the city, which may be disturbing to some viewers.
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During the last few months in the bunker there was a critical shortage of food. Whenever possible some of the women would venture out to search for slain horses in the streets. The German army had a large number of cavalry and a lot of it now was killed in the bombings.
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Survivor Rescue under Fire - Late April close to the End
There was little that could be done for the injured but to keep them away from collapsing buildings. There was no medical care, food or water.
The Russian Victory Parade - May 3, 1945
The picture was taken by an unknown photographer just a few feet away from the apartment building where Dieter had been in the bunker. Looking up the Kaiserdamm toward the Siegesseule and the Brandenburg Gate in the back. To the right front is the entrance to the Lietzensee Park. When the tanks started passing the building where Dieter was standing, the noise became almost unbearable. Their turrets were swinging back and forth, occasionally firing into the ruins lining the avenue.
The Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial Church
The haunting image of the destroyed main tower stands today as a warning. In the bottom of the ruin is a small room giving the history of the church. Also present is the water basin where Rolf was baptized. The tower is now surrounded by a modern cathedral.
The November 22/24, 1943 RAF Air Raids on Berlin
On that date the RAF sent 764 air craft to Berlin on their first big raid, catching Dieter and his mother on the main avenue, close to the church. They made it into the public bunker by the Zoo, where they remained for 48 Hours. It is Dieter's first sustained memory of his life.
The raid destroyed the church, most of the central district in Berlin, made 250,000 people homeless, created fire storms and sent plumes of smoke 17,000 feet into the sky.
It was the first of many such big raids on the German capital. Between December 2 and 4 about 1,000 RAF bombers would return and lay vast areas of the city uninhabitable. Nearly 25% of all housing was destroyed, starting a massive flow of refugees out of Berlin. By now Dieter had become terrified of the noise, fires and heat.
Looking up the Ku-Damm toward the Church as it looks today
Still a ritzy shopping and residential area this used to be central part of West Berlin before reunification. Now the old main tourist centers of the Brandenburg Gate and Potsdammer Platz have regained their old splendor.
The Zoo Bunker and Flak Tower
The massive structure could hold about 15,000 citizens to protect them from the air raids. It had six foot concrete walls and proved to be virtually indestructible after the war. Visible on top are the four enclosures for the giant anti aircraft guns and the radar site, which was a relatively new technology at the time. Dieter remembers the trees in front of the entrance where he was waiting with his mother to be let in.
After Berlin surrendered the bunker held 30,000 people, including some SS troops. Russian guns firing point blank into the structure could not penetrate the walls. After a few days the bunker also surrendered, releasing the civilians held captive under horrible conditions.
After Berlin surrendered the bunker held 30,000 people, including some SS troops. Russian guns firing point blank into the structure could not penetrate the walls. After a few days the bunker also surrendered, releasing the civilians held captive under horrible conditions.
The Zoo bunker in late 1945. The British had made several attempts to demolish the structure without much success. In 1948, after placing 35 tons of explosives into the structure, it was finally destroyed. The site today is part of the Zoo and houses the Hippo Park. It was the only one of the many flak towers that was completely demolished. Most of the other ruins were buried under rubble, with some parts still visible. One of them in Berlin is a tourist site and two floors are open to visitors.
In the absence of running water and basic sanitary facilities, Berliners took to any body of water to get cleaned. In the background is the massive wreck of the Zoo bunker, which took several years to demolish.
Heavy Russian Armor advancing toward the Tiergarten
Every window, doorway or mound of rubble could hold a defender with an antitank 'Panzerfaust', some of them young children, most of them old man. Few elite troops were left and there was only a handful of tanks, which had no fuel. One Tiger tank at the Reichstag took out over 20 Russian tanks before succumbing. The Germans fought door to door with fanaticism, their morale never broken. They also had little choice, as they would be strung up on lamp posts by the remaining SS troops, if they tried to give up. Most of them would die.
Russian tanks advancing through the burning center of Berlin
It was difficult for the Soviet heavy armor to move through the rubble filled streets where the ragtag defenders, including children, were waiting with makeshift antitank weapons. They would all die.
Berlin Center - May 8, 1945 - The End has come
A dead soldier lies among the rubble and destroyed equipment that litters the streets everywhere.
The Battle is over
Streets filled with destroyed equipment and rubble
with burned out buildings was all that was left of the once proud and beautiful city. A burned-out Panther Tank by the Brandenburg Gate
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German Youth POW's
Children called to fight, for that was all that was left, just children - the terror etched on their faces. The few who survived became prisoners of the Russians and were sent to Siberia. Not many would return. A whole generation just disappeared leaving a strange female/male imbalance for some time. |
Central Berlin - Just off the Brandenburg Gate
This view shows the unimaginable destruction. When the fighting ended over 90% of the population was homeless.
Below an aerial view taken of central Berlin. Not a single building has survived the bombings and final street battles.
Below an aerial view taken of central Berlin. Not a single building has survived the bombings and final street battles.
School Children Mid-1945
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Berlin - May 1945
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Epilogue - A Historical Footnote
The battle of Berlin would go down in history as the bloodiest and biggest military engagement ever fought. To this day hundreds of historians are still searching for answers. New facts are discovered almost daily. The immense amount of documents that became available after the fall of the Soviet Union and the East German government will keep the historians occupied for many more years.
Current estimates give the Soviet losses during the final assault as between 80,000 and 300,000 killed in action. On the German side between 200,000 and 500,000 are thought to have been killed.
These numbers are staggering, taking into consideration that there were virtually no German organized military units left to fight. There was no Air Force, virtually no fuel for the few remaining tanks and little artillary.
On the other hand the Russians had massed 6,000 tanks, 12,000 artillary and over 2 million men that encircled the city.
The battle was fought by the 'Volkssturm', a collection of untrained, ill supplied old man and children, with a ferocity and determination that defies comprehension. There was a belief in final victory until virtually the last moment.
Current estimates put the Russian casualties during the war in Europe at 26.8 million; German at 8.8 million and Polish at 5.8 million
Current estimates give the Soviet losses during the final assault as between 80,000 and 300,000 killed in action. On the German side between 200,000 and 500,000 are thought to have been killed.
These numbers are staggering, taking into consideration that there were virtually no German organized military units left to fight. There was no Air Force, virtually no fuel for the few remaining tanks and little artillary.
On the other hand the Russians had massed 6,000 tanks, 12,000 artillary and over 2 million men that encircled the city.
The battle was fought by the 'Volkssturm', a collection of untrained, ill supplied old man and children, with a ferocity and determination that defies comprehension. There was a belief in final victory until virtually the last moment.
Current estimates put the Russian casualties during the war in Europe at 26.8 million; German at 8.8 million and Polish at 5.8 million